In pastoral counseling, I have learned that people can be very complex. As I learned to navigate through such matters, I would often say, “Questions prick the conscience, statements harden the heart.” That has served me well as I walk alongside people in their struggle with sin! “The purpose of a man’s heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out” (Prov 20:5). Scripture indicates that we can draw out the deep, heart-level issue by soul searching. Charles Spurgeon … [Read more...]
Three types of dangerous leaders
Lately, I have had an opportunity to pull back from all the busy activities of ministry and to simply stop, reflect, and think. I have learned and grown from personal experience, watching a few incredible leaders and some, not-so-great leaders. During the past 10 years, I’ve learned about three dangerous kinds of leaders: 1. The solo-leader. There’s always one or two of these in every leadership team. The one who has the mentality that ministry is about himself/herself and is not … [Read more...]
What knocks leaders out of ministry?
“No, no, no. Not him!” was my first thought when I heard the tragic story. It was one of my close pastor friends who was terminated from a church. I couldn’t believe the news. “Why, God? Why?” What are the sin areas that get pastors out of ministry? 1. Is it sexual immorality? My professor talked about his first pastorate as an associate, and soon the senior pastor was caught committing adultery with a children’s worker in the nursery. The church called a special business meeting on a … [Read more...]
Characteristics of a leader
Hiring can be such a challenging task for churches. Depending on the church background it comes from, many churches often put a search committee together from the body and begins to discuss and talk through who could possibly be the best fit for the position! Why is this difficult? After putting in so much time, talent and treasure, hiring a wrong person that does not fit the culture of the church can cause heartache and havoc. As I have been meditating and thinking on this, here are … [Read more...]
God is not done with your story
Growing up, I lived in great fear of my abusive father. His treatment convinced me that I was unwanted, that I was a burden hardly worth being tolerated. By age 15, this led me to become very embittered and depressed. I felt rejected and covered up my loneliness and pain with a protective mask of anger. Void of love and acceptance, I often questioned why I was alive, and whether my life even mattered. Somewhere deep inside, I longed to know that there was more to life than the hard, angry … [Read more...]
Lesson from a shooting tragedy
August 19, 2013, began like any other Monday at Uptown Baptist Church in Chicago. As usual, I handled routine administrative tasks and worked on my sermon for the evening service at our soup kitchen ministry. The church employees were in the office working and chatting. No one knew it would become a day marked by tragedy. At 5:00 p.m., we welcomed 150 people from the streets for our first service. For our second service at 5:45 p.m., we had approximately 100 people in the pews waiting for … [Read more...]
God becomes man
“The Christmas message is that there is hope for a ruined humanity – a hope of pardon, a hope of peace with God, the hope of glory – because at the Father’s will Jesus became poor and was born in a stable so that thirty years later, He might hang on a cross.” – J. I. Packer Lights are up, presents under the tree, and Christmas songs on the streets. Yes, it is that time of year. Christmas is a wonderful time, isn’t it? We as Christians must remember what this month is all about! Too often … [Read more...]
What if you’re working with a toxic leader?
As a bright-eyed 19-year-old college student, I immediately found a church to get involved in within my new college town. However, when I applied for a position at this church, I had no idea there was a history of high turnover that had become a regular part of this inner-city church. I also didn’t know the church had a reputation for being a spiritually abusive church, primarily through the leader’s manipulative control tactics. What made the situation more difficult was the pastor was … [Read more...]
Can we love without being vulnerable?
As a pastor of a local church in Missouri, I remember the advice I first received when I entered full-time ministry. A pastor from another church approached me and said, “Well, you have to remember one thing: Don’t become friends with those you minister to. Staff are employees and you just want to keep a professional relationship.” This left me in a dilemma. Though his advice made practical sense, I couldn’t reconcile what he said with the Bible’s call to “love one another” (John … [Read more...]
Can we love Jesus, but not the church?
“I love Jesus, but not the church.” This is what someone recently told me, and it left me puzzled. The person continued, “Can’t I watch a sermon online in my living room? I’ll never leave Jesus, but I’m done with the church.” Is it possible to have Jesus without the church? What role does the local church play in personal transformation? Can one grow spiritually without participation in the local church? In conversations like this one, I sense grave confusion concerning the doctrine of … [Read more...]
Five steps to conflict resolution
Conflict at cost is visible everywhere. In light of this, Christians are to be the salt and the light of Jesus by promoting the gospel of peace by not only believing the gospel but living the gospel. Conflict is unavoidable, as people are bound by their sinful nature. Conflict is not necessarily bad but often it is dealt with poorly and destroys relationships. Studies show conflict is seen everywhere in pastoral ministry. Within the last five years, research states that the number of … [Read more...]
Discipleship equals more than words
Who are your prayer warriors? Who are those few people that you can pick up a phone and ask for prayer? I had an opportunity to teach children for a Sunday school, and I asked the same question. When I asked these little children, interestingly, the top two came out as the following: 1. Mama; 2. Grandma. As I look back, it is personally true in my own life! I think of my mother, who had a huge spiritual impact upon my life. So much of who I am today is in answer to her prayers for me. Her … [Read more...]